Part 11

Xander, Tara and Willow hide in the shadows of the small alley. The boy balances the 3-Inch-vampire on his hand so Spike can watch them all and participate in the conversation. To any passer-by it may look as if Xander sells drugs to some innocent girls, but they’re in Sunnydale – nobody cares what happens in the shadows.

“I…, we want to say, we’re sorry for what happened to you, Spike.” Tara tells the vampire directly. Finally, someone who doesn’t ignore him.
“’s not your fault, Glinda.” Willow tries to make herself even smaller.
“We want to help you.” Tara goes on, without reaction to Spike’s comment.
“Really? Help me, fix this?” Spike asks sceptically. It’s not easy to accept help from the person that actually got you in trouble.
“Yes, yes, Spike. It’s not right you’re like this and maybe we can undo it again and…” Willow babbles. She is near tears.
“Well, Red, it’s gotta be the least you can do, hasn’t it?”
“Spike, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to… I mean I only wanted to save you. I did not want to do this to you, but at least I saved you… somehow.”
“At least you’ve stopped bloody lying, witch.” Spike spits, without accepting her apology.

While Spike and Willow talk, Xander watches Tara closely. She doesn’t seem surprised at all that Willow did change Spike’s size. Xander wanders if Willow told her or if Tara figured it out by herself. Does shy, nice Tara tolerate a blatantly lying girlfriend?
“Willow and I are going to do some research and find out how to undo this spell. Since it’s done out of good thought, we should be able to find a solution quickly.” Tara, unusually, takes the leading part in the conversation. “Please come by our dorm room tomorrow after sunset. Maybe we’ll have some results by then. At least, we’ll have a lot of guilt-cookies, won’t we, Willow?” Tara finishes boldly and Willow takes in an appalled breath. Xander adores Tara’s courage; maybe they all underestimate the silent witch.
“Thank you, Glinda.” Spike says smiling in relief that someone is going to help him.
“Yeah, thank you, Tara. Good night you two. We’ll see each other tomorrow.” With that, Xander and Spike are on their way home. The witches disappear back into the Magic Box.

Xander and Spike’s walk back to the new apartment passes almost in a comfortable silence – well, it would if Xander didn’t chuckle to himself a few times until Spike couldn’t take it anymore.
“What’s so damn funny, git?”
Still laughing slightly, Xander answers: “Nothing.”
“Yeah, sure. For nothing, you’re giggling far too much!”
“I am not giggling! Girls giggle, I don’t giggle.” Xander bursts out between fits of laughter.
“Come on, just tell. Make fun of good old Spike.”
“I’m not making fun of you.” Xander says honestly, even if it’s hard to believe with that fat grin on his face. Spike raises an annoyed eyebrow. “It’s just; I never thought I’d ever carry you home!”
“So you imagined me carrying you home?” Spike turns Xander’s words around.
“Yes, I mean, no. Why should I. Well, maybe, it could be..., should I ever be injured in a fight on patrol and should I be in such a bad condition that I can’t walk on my own, maybe you…” Xander drifts off, face bright red and laughter swapped with embarrasement.
“You’ve got some fantasies in that head of yours!” Spike snickers, trying to play it down, even if there is some hope building in the possibility that Xander might be interested in him as a bit more than friends.
“It’s not a fantasy. Not that kind of fantasy. Nothing in a dreamy way of fantasy kind of thing!” Xander tries to explain helplessly. “Just thought that maybe some night, some fight, I might not be able to walk home on my own and who’d help me then. I just couldn’t imagine Buffy carrying me. Or Willow. Or Giles. So that left you.”
“Yeah, sure.” Spike shrugs, not quite believing Xander’s babbled explanation. Silence stretches out and Spike wonders how little trust Xander has in his so called friends and father figure.

“So, would you?”
“Would I what?”
“Carry me home? If I was injured or passed out?”
Spike takes a moment to think about that. He feels that Xander needs a no-nonsense answer to that question. It’s one of those moments that define a relationship.
“Guess so.” Spike finally says and means it. He always was too loyal, even to people who never deserved his loyalty.
Xander lets out a breath he didn’t know he was holding. “That’s good. Good to know.”

The rest of the way home passes in the same comfortable silence in which it began. The whelp’s warm hand feels good around Spike. The slow pace and the rhythmical swing of Xander’s body are calming the vampire down in a way he can’t remember feeling before. He can’t remember having felt this safe before.

They arrive at the apartment shortly after 9 pm. Even if it’s still early in Scoobie time, Xander claims to be very tired. After some face stuffing at the fridge and some blood letting for Spike, Xander sets Spike down inside the doll house. The youth steps out of most of his clothes, then gets into bed. Spike shrugs out of the duster and shirt and pulls off his boots. He’s restless and misses the warmth Xander’s hand had provided him shortly before.

Finally, he decides to be bold.
“Xander?”
“Wow – was that my name you said?”
“Git!”
“Guess you want something?”
“Yes.”
“So?” Xander sits up in the bed to have a better view of the little, only half unclothed vampire.
“I just - it’s silly – to hell – what’s sillier than a shrunken vampire in a doll house?”
“A shrunken vampire in yellow…”
“Shut up, git! Can I sleep there?”
“Where?” Xander looks around himself, searching for the place Spike refers to. “Here?” He gestures to the bed, stunned.
“Yes. I mean, on your hand?”
“You want to sleep on my hand?”
“It’s warm. Electric blanket, remember?”
“But, but – it’s dangerous!”
Spike looks at Xander uncomprehendingly. “Dangerous? Dangerous how?”
“I could, I mean, I could – don’t get angry – squash you!”
Spike thinks for a second. “You wouldn’t.”
“You can’t know that! Once I had this dream where I fell off a building and I needed to hold on with all my strength to not fall off and I’d squash you if the dream repeats itself and…”
“You won’t have that dream again. Not tonight at least. You won’t squash me.” Spike answers, his voice reassuring and full of patience. He wants to sleep warm!
“How can you be so sure?”
“I just am. Now let me – take me over there.” Spike smiles over the perfect double meaning of the sentence and hates being small with renewed energy.
“Okay, I’ll do it – at your own risk! It’s your life, unlife you’re putting into my hand – and wow, that’s some trust you have in me!” Xander finishes and stares in wonder at Spike. “You trust me!”

Spike rolls his eyes. “Get over it. It’s not as if I have a choice.”
“But you do have a choice. You could stay in the house.” Xander doesn’t let it drop so easily and Spike grits his teeth. He hates to be seen through so easily. Xander is stunned. The fact that Spike, of all people – hated enemy and long-time idol – does trust him is just too cool.
“Can I go to bed, I mean to hand now?”
“Sure, just…”
“What now?” Spike asks, annoyed.
“Just, say it.”
“What?”
“That you trust me. I want to hear it.”
“No.”
“Please.”
“No.”
“Puppy-eyes-please?” Xander says and makes the puppy eyes at Spike who melts inwardly.
“Damn you, Harris. Yeah, I do trust you, Xander!” Spike says through gritted teeth.
Xander watches the vampire for a moment intently, then with his most earnest voice he says: “I feel honoured, Spike.”
“Bloody hell, boy!” Spike explodes, unable to handle this situation. Xander pulls back abruptly and turns his eyes down. His fingers play with the blanket unsteadily.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to…”
“Xander, look at me. I was just surprised, okay?” Spike says, calmingly. The big brown almost-manga eyes of the boy look back at the vampire. “It’s just – nobody ever trusted me or said he trusted me.”

If there ever is a moment where the Powers That Be should revoke spells spontaneously – this would be the moment. Spike begs them, from all his heart and non-existent soul, but it doesn’t change anything. He so wants to pull the boy into his arms and make the hurt and doubts go away, but at his size it’s absolutely impossible to do that. All that is left to Spike are words: “Xander, I wasn’t mocking you. I was really surprised. You did so much, you still do so much for me. Without you I’d be in real trouble, if not already dust. I thank you for all that and I trust you with my unlife. I didn’t know it means so much to you.”

Spike pauses and thinks for a moment about people he trusted before. He trusted Cecily not to laugh and she did. He trusted Dru to show him another life and she killed him. He trusted Angelus to care for him and he left. He trusted Dru to be his forever and she disappeared. There was not one person, that didn’t disappoint him. “There is no one else on this planet I trust but you, Xander.” Spike says sincerely, more to himself than to the whelp.

Without another word, Xander holds out his hand to the vampire whose shoulders are hunched, hands put deeply into the pockets of his jeans. “Thank you.” Spike says louder, looking forward to the delicious warm sleeping place the whelp offers him. “No, Spike, thank you.”

Xander lies down on his side and puts his hand down near his head on the pillow. After Spike himself lies down, Xander pulls up the blanket. The youth drags up one edge of it to cover Spike, too. They’re only a few Inches from each other, face to face and Spike wishes, for the thousandth time these past few days, to be normal sized again. Mind you, if he’d been normal sized, chances are he wouldn’t have been here in bed with Xander at all. Still he feels good where he is and he plans on staying there quite a while longer – especially when he is back to his original size again. He’s got way more than 3 Inches to give to Xander.

It doesn’t take long until both of them are fast asleep, Xander’s fingers curled tenderly around Spike’s fragile body.

Part 12

Xander wakes up the next morning a while before the alarm is supposed to go off due to him going to bed early the evening before. Like yesterday, the sun shines through the living room windows. For a delightful moment Xander is completely taken aback by the magnitude of his own apartment. He really did it – moved out of the crappy basement, has a well paid job, has a friend who trusts him. Life is great – finally.

Thinking of Spike gives him a brief moment of panic, but it subsides instantly when he finds Spike still sleeping on his hand which is still on the pillow beside his head as if he hadn’t moved at all during the night. The blanket has been pulled down though, but Spike doesn’t look as if he is cold. The vampire is hugging Xander’s thumb with both arms and one leg thrown over it. Xander’s fingers are carefully curled around the small vampire. Xander is happy and relieved: he hasn’t squashed the vampire! On the contrary, it looks as if Xander’s hand protects Spike from any and every evil in this and any other world.

Spike looks cute, cuddled up into his palm, still fast asleep. Xander wonders if he’d also think that about the normal sized version of the vampire. He remembers how sincerely Spike told him yesterday that he trusts Xander. The youth is still proud over that admission. Who’d have thought?

Some minutes pass while Xander watches the vampire in his sleep until it’s time to turn off the alarm before it rattles loudly. Slowly and carefully, Xander moves, sits up and pushes the stop button on the alarm. The boy holds his hand in front of his chest and watches Spike wake up from the movement. Spike’s hair is ruffled and the vampire stretches himself, seemingly unaware of his surroundings.

When Spike opens his eyes, he looks directly into Xander’s big, brown ones which express tenderness and joy. Xander smiles at him and for Spike it’s like the sun rising.
“Good morning, sleepyhead. Did you sleep well?” Xander whispers at the vampire with a voice still husky from sleep. Spike shudders, as Xander’s words are sending butterflies into his belly.
“Haven’t slept so well in decades, pet.” Spike answers barely keeping himself from purring contently.
“Glad to hear that. Glad I didn’t squash you.” Xander grins and Spike laughs slightly.
“Told you, you wouldn’t.”
“So, are you up and ready for another day with me?”
Spike rolls his eyes. If Xander only knew how up and ready he was exactly!
“Would like some breakfast.” Spike says out loud and inspects the little cuts on Xander’s thumb from where he had bled himself to feed Spike. The vampire carefully peels off some of the scab of the freshest wound. Xander doesn’t even feel it, just looks and lets Spike continue. He hopes Spike doesn’t hurt him unintentionally because he doesn’t want Spike to be hurt by the chip. A bit of the scab comes off and there is the slightest welling up of blood. The vampire doesn’t hesitate, he changes and puts his mouth to the little wound on Xander’s thumb. His fangs sink into the wound without Xander noticing it and Spike starts suckling greedily. Xander smiles proudly. He can make Spike happy, he can even nourish him. He can give Spike everything he needs.

While Xander has breakfast, Spike has a bath in a lasagne bowl. Spike didn’t want Xander to eat alone, so the bowl is set down on the table. It’s filled with a lot of bubbles and Spike’s not known for his modesty anyway. While the little vampire washes his hair and scrubs every part of skin he can reach by himself, Xander watches him and chews his cereal. Xander is still fascinated by the grace and flexibility with which the vampire moves, how the small, fragile body parts work together so fluently and efficiently.

Spike gets nervous under Xander’s intense observation. He makes a show of letting the little piece of soap glide over his arms and chest but it seems not to have the wanted effect on Xander. Spike is sure Xander would not watch him so intently in the bath tub if he’d been normal sized. The boy would blush and stutter and take flight instantly. The expression on Xander’s face and in his eyes is more one of technical interest and it makes Spike’s hairs stand up with unease. He feels like some sort of lab rat and that is so not an experience he wants to repeat.

“Be a pal, give me a hand, well, a finger?” Spike asks and breaks the silence and Xander’s stare. He turns over, puts his hands on the rim of the bowl and keeps looking at Xander over his shoulder. Xander watches the vampire’s slim back, the movement of the shoulders, the flex of the muscles on Spike’s once again or once more well-built body. The human blood diet worked wonders. Spike’s ass is only barely coated with foam and for a millisecond Xander has a flash of normal-sized Spike in this position, hollow back, ass in the air, waiting for him to catch on... Huh!?

“Scrub my back?” Spike asks, annoyed to outward appearances but secretly pleased by the delicious little blush that forms on Xander’s cheeks. To his disappointment, it fades as fast as it came.
“Sure, just scream if I overdo it.” Xander says, dipping two fingers of his right hand into the water, catching foam with the tips and then slowly rubbing them over the muscular back in circles, then up and down along the vampire’s spine, just keeping millimetres above Spike’s bottom. Spike lets his head fall back with the first touch of the warm fingers to his water-warmed body. He restrains himself from moaning, but his eyelids flutter shut. Xander puts on just enough pressure and works the kinks out just right. Of course, the vampire delights in these touches also on a more sexual level. Only the fact that Xander would instantly stop touching him if he’d noticed Spike wank, keeps the vampire from trying that.

Fifteen minutes later, Spike is a delightful, moaning piece of butter under Xander’s massage and the boy smiles happily that he’s given Spike so much pleasure. Xander thinks he carries out his new role of a caring and responsible … man every day a little more; it makes him proud. However, to be responsible means to go to work on time and that’s what he needs to do now – even if he could continue massaging Spike forever.

“Got to stop now. I need to go down, got a job to do, money to earn.” Xander says and slowly withdraws his fingers from the satin skin of Spike’s back.
“Don’t!” The vampire pouts.
“I am sorry, but I have to.” Spike continues pouting and Xander feels a little helpless. It seems saying no to Spike is getting harder with those pouting lips and begging blue eyes. “Tell you what… the next chance we get, I promise you another massage even longer and better than this one. Okay?”
Spike is eager to agree. Of course, he won’t demand the fulfilling of the promise until he is normal sized again. A devilish grin crosses the vampire’s face as soon as Xander turns to put the dishes into the sink. Whelp is in for some surprises and, with a little luck, by tonight if the witches are able to revoke the spell.

Xander takes Spike with him to work as he did the day before. The vampire lazily lies in a big armchair and watches Xander’s hands work. Now he has had a little taste of what these long fingers are capable of he can’t wait to get them to touch him again. His trousers are uncomfortably tight all the time which annoys him, but he hasn’t had any alone time yet to relieve the tension. In the meantime, he enjoys the simmering of lust in his belly and his balls. The exhibitionist in him, though, enjoys being hard right in front of Xander’s eyes. He gives a stroke to his hard cock through the fabric of his trousers occasionally and he closes his eyes and dreams of Xander’s hands and mouth travelling over his body.

Finally, the long working hours are over. Xander takes Spike up into the apartment and sets him down inside the living room of his doll house. Spike uses the ride on the boy‘s hand as another opportunity to rub his hard cock against Xander’s hot thumb with every step. Xander has barely disappeared through the door to take a shower, when Spike rips open his trousers and falls to his knees. With one hand he holds himself, the other touches his purple cock just once before he instantly comes convulsing, pumping long streams of come on his living room floor. A whispered “Xander” stays unheard.

The vampire cleans himself and the floor with a shred of the paper tissues formerly used as his footstool. He sits down in his armchair and closes his eyes. Giddy with enthusiasm, Xander storms out of the shower only a few minutes later. The boy gets into his clothes and grabs a sleepy Spike. “Come on, Mini-vamp, we’re going to those lovely witchy ladies now to have you turned back to the Big Bad!” Spike smiles dopily, still enjoying the aftermath of his intense orgasm; he doesn’t even notice Xander calling him Mini-vamp. Suddenly, nervousness grabs his belly with an icy fist: what if the witches didn’t find a way to turn him back and - what if they did?

Part 13

Xander’s footsteps sound hollow as he walks down the hallway to the witches’ dorm room. He only needs to knock once before the door opens. Willow looks at them. Under her eyes are dark circles that tell of a night of research or just of a night without sleep. He grins, images of Tara and Willow, naked, kissing, touching, are swirling in his head for a moment before he recollects why he is here actually. Tara sits on the bed, a big book on her knees. She looks up and smiles at Xander and Spike, who peeks out from his usual transport spot: Xander’s shirt pocket.

“Come on in, you two. We think we have found it. I mean Tara has found a spell to revoke the side effects on Spike’s size.” Willow beams at them and steps to the side so Xander can enter the dorm room.
“Hey Tara, hey Willow. Sounds like good news.” Xander waves at Tara and stands uncertainly in the middle of the room.
“Hello Xander, Spike. Indeed, we have something. Actually it’s quite easy, there aren’t even any weird ingredients needed.” Tara says and pets a space beside her on the bed. Xander sits down. The blonde turns the book so Xander and Spike can look at the words written on the page.
“Here, it’s in this chapter. Simple counter spells to unintended side effects. The spells are not specifically phrased to unshrink someone but they are like universal counter spells.” Tara explains, tapping her finger onto words on the page.
“Nice – that’s written in Latin. Can’t really follow you there.” Xander shrugs.
“It’s totally easy! We just need to try out some and one will have the desired effect on Spike, promise!” Willow babbles and Spike growls.
“Try some of them out? Do I look like some kind of guinea pig, Red? Guess you tried out enough on me already.” Spike spits. Xander watches Tara looking angrily at Willow. Uh oh, trouble in paradise.

“Cookies?” Willow offers, voice quiet and feeble. She nearly pushes the plate with the chocolate cookies into Xander’s face. Xander takes one, because it’s chocolate, duh! “This doesn’t mean you’re forgiven, Will.” He says, before biting into the cookie.
“It doesn’t? But…, I baked cookies and I…, I apologized, like, a lot.” Willow puts one hand on her hip, the other busy with holding the plate.
“Willow…” Xander tries to warn her. “So not the attitude to have right now.”

Spike would like to join in, but he feels this is a fight Xander has to get through on his own. Willow and Xander have been friends since kindergarten, but the last few months they’ve drifted apart. Spike doesn’t trust Willow but it’s Xander who needs to decide if he still trusts her, if he can uphold the friendship with her any longer.

“What do you mean – attitude! I saved your life! I even saved Spike’s, ehm, existence. I don’t know why you’re complaining at all.” Willow turns away arrogantly and puts down the plate.
“I’m not complaining about you saving our lives. I’m just questioning the means. Magic is not the solution to everything!” Xander barely refrains from yelling at her.
“The means? What would you have done? Throw yourself into the fight and get yourself killed? Everybody knows you’re completely useless on patrol!”
The words leave Willow’s mouth and the hand she clamps over it comes too late. Xander feels dazed. “Xander, I didn’t mean to…”
“Oh I think you did.” Xander says apathetically. It’s not that he doesn’t know it. He gets pounded on more often than he pounds, but still, without his distractions, Buffy would’ve sometimes had a harder fight.

Xander helps Spike out of his shirt pocket and sets the little vampire down on Tara’s waiting hand. Spike is in his full vamp-face because he is so angry that Willow hurt his boy with words so much. Under normal circumstances he’d kill her without hesitation. Nobody hurts what is his. But right now, two things - his size and the chip - are keeping him from it.

Xander shakes himself and sits up straight. An unusual strength seems to come from deeply inside him when he starts speaking then.
“Your attempts to use magic are getting us into trouble more often than it is useful. You aren’t ready to use magic, you can’t control it in the least. It’s way bigger than you are able to understand.”
“What are you trying to say? I saved our lives. That is all that counts.”
“No, it’s not. You saved our lives, well great, but it was only luck. You could have shrunken all of us or done something even worse. You didn’t know at all what you were doing exactly. You endangered us. You put us in incalculable risk. You made Spike a…”
“What do you care anyway? It’s Spike. Vampire. Soulless. Bad. Remember? Ring any bells?” Willow spits and looks ugly with all the anger distorting her face.
“I care because Spike has saved our lives a lot of times and he doesn’t deserve to be killed by one of your tricks. He is more reliable than you are since you’ve been on this magic trip.”
“I can’t believe you are saying this, Xander! I have always been there for you and that’s the thanks I get for all that.”
“Oh come on, Will. That’s not what this is about.” Xander sighs. The anger seems to have faded away already. There is only disappointed sadness left in him.

“This is exactly what this is about. You’re losing ground!”
“I what?”
“You always tagged along with Buffy and everybody, but now we are all something special and you aren’t. You feel useless and that’s why you’re trying to make me feel all bad about using magic. I am a powerful Wicca, Buffy is the Slayer, Spike is the Superfighter, Giles the Brainy… And what are you, Xander?” She actually has the nerve to look at him pitifully.

Tara holds Spike back from leaping at her girlfriend. Silent tears are running down her face. She is not surprised, but it still shocks her to have Willow say all these things which Tara had seen in her aura already. Blackness is winding around Willow‘s red-golden light like a big dangerous snake, and it is getting bigger with each passing day, eating away at Willow’s core.

“I don’t need any superpowers, Willow. I fight for good because it is the right thing to do. It’s not some ego-gig for me. I’d rather die before I’d put one of you at risk. Buffy understands that. I am sorry you didn’t get it.” Xander speaks evenly with a strong voice he doesn’t use often. It’s the core of him, his white knight talking.

“Stay a loser if you like that. I don’t care. I don’t care about Spike at all. Magic is more effective than one fighter can be. To hell with you. I won’t help you. There is the door, you know how to use it. Good-bye.” Willow’s eyes sparkle with blackness. It frightens Xander so much – he is afraid for Willow. She needs to be saved and soon – before she does something she’ll regret forever.

Tara stands up suddenly to Xander’s surprise. She sets Spike down on Xander’s shoulder but the vampire quickly climbs back down Xander’s arm into the safety of the boy’s hand. Spike hugs Xander’s thumb and looks up into the boy’s brown, sad eyes. He wishes he could hug him for real. Spike is very proud of Xander. He stood up to Willow in a spectacular and knight-y way. Xander pets the vampire’s back tenderly.

Tara speaks with a commanding voice Xander has never heard from her before. “It’s time for you to go, Willow. I will help Spike and Xander.”
“What? Tara?” Willow’s surprise over the fact that her girlfriend is standing up to her is clearly written on her face. Tara doesn’t say anything, she gestures to the door and it opens. “You… you can’t throw me out of my own room!” Willow gasps.
“It is, or rather it was, our room. I can’t throw you out but I can ask you to leave for a couple of hours. I won’t need more time to get my things and leave. You can have the room all to yourself again when I’m gone.”

“I… Tara… why are you – you don’t have to leave! I only had a fight with Xander… it doesn’t change anything between us…” Willow stutters uncomprehendingly.
“I want to leave.” Tara says and for a second it looks like she’ll lose her poise. While tears are running down her cheeks, she keeps on speaking determinedly. “You’ve changed, Willow. Magic changed you. You are not the person anymore I… I fell in love with.”
“No. No, Tara, that’s not right… you can’t…”
“Please leave now, Willow.”
“You don’t have anywhere to go.”
“I’ll find a place.”
“But you are lost without me.”
“I will manage.”
“You will manage?” Willow squeaks. There are tears gathering in her eyes and she gestures wildly, but the words normally accompanying are missing.
“Please go now, Willow. Don’t make me…”
“You can’t make me go.”

Without further comment Tara raises her hands and gestures as if she was sweeping the floor with a broom. Horrified, Willow watches helplessly as her body begins to float, only an inch above the floor, then moves toward and then through the door which closes behind her silently.

“You’re going to regret that, Tara!” Willow screams from outside and pounds at the door. Tara draws a circle with her hands in the air, and after a soft golden glow, there is only silence left.

“We’re safe here. She’ll give up soon. She is not very patient.” Tara says, before she collapses on the floor, sobbing into her hands. Only seconds later, Xander is there to hold her while she cries. He puts his hand over Tara’s and Spike hugs both their thumbs, providing as much comfort as he can give.

Part 14

Tara’s sobs subside quickly. Too quickly. “Not the time to cry.” The blonde sniffs and rubs at her nose with the back of her hand. Xander finds her a tissue. She smiles at him and then at Spike. “We need to unshrink you. I could use some help carrying my stuff outside, superpowers come in handy there.” She tells Spike and grabs for the hand Xander reaches down to her. He pulls her to her feet.

“You sure, you’re strong enough to go all witchy?” Xander asks her. Tara laughs softly and he blushes. “It’s totally adorable how much you care for Spike.” Spike beams. “I can do this. I’ve been trained in White Magic all my life. White Magic runs in the family, at least all the females of my line have the ability to use it in their nature. My mom had already anchored me to the Balance when I was very young. Sadly, she died when I was seven so she couldn’t teach me more. The males in my family do not tolerate anything supernatural and well, yeah, you were there when they came to retrieve me.”

“But I don’t understand why you’d think you were something bad or demon-y when your mom gave you the clues already.” Spike puts in. Xander nods.

“My mom, when she told me about these things, she never used words like witch or magic or demons. She just told me, I was something special and that I had something inside me that can help to keep the world in balance. She never talked about good or evil – it was always about Balance. I didn’t know enough… then she died – and when I got older, my dad and my brothers belittled everything and everyone the slightest bit different from themselves or their ideas of how the world should be. I hated it.” Tara shudders in memory of that time.

“So why is it, Red goes round the bend with magicks and you don’t. She using black magic?” Spike leans back against Xander’s thumb, crosses his arm’s in front of his chest.

“No, it’s not black magic. It’s power that comes with magic and she…, she was never anchored, she never had a real tutor. Giles is no help to her at all. She didn’t take me seriously when I tried to tell her about the Balance. It’s as if I am always beneath her.” Fresh tears run down Tara’s face and Xander quickly gives her another paper tissue. Spike cringes when he hears Tara’s last words. He knows exactly how the blonde has been feeling all along. Xander doesn’t know what to say at all so he stays quiet and awkwardly pats her on the shoulder in an attempt to take away the pain.

Tara pulls herself out of the mourning she feels. “Let’s do the spell now. I don’t want to be here longer than necessary.” She grabs for the book and opens it to the page she showed Xander earlier. “I don’t think we need to try out spells. This one is a powerful spell that interacts and relies on healing energy. That should do it.” Tara nods and gets a piece of chalk. She draws a circle on the floor, just big enough for one normal sized person to stand in. “Put Spike in there.” She says and studies the text in the book.

“In there? In there! Like right now? I mean. Are you sure? Is that the right spell? Spike needs to agree. No ingredients? Draw a circle and, yay, Spike’s back? Isn’t that dangerous? What if something goes wrong? What if Spike…” Xander rattles down every thought in his head.

“Don’t get your knickers in a twist, pet. Good, ol’ Glinda’ll fix me up fine. Now gimme a kiss for luck and set me down there.” Spike rolls his eyes, annoyed. He is very, very nervous but a man doesn’t need to show everything, does he? Tara giggles.

“Euww Spike, no kissing, but I’ll cross my fingers for you.” Xander kneels down and sets the little vampire in the circle. Suddenly, he feels like he should give Spike a kiss to say good-bye. How nancy is that? He gets back on his feet and takes several steps back from the circle quickly. It’s time Spike is Spike again –the vampire being small, is making him think weird thoughts.

Tara sits down cross-legged close to the circle. She holds up her hands in front of Spike. She bows forward and looks directly into the vampire’s eyes. Spike feels as if Tara can look inside him down to his core, maybe she can. Whatever she sees, it makes her smile so Spike is relieved.

“I’m going to start now. Try to relax your body and concentrate on your original size. It shouldn’t take long until you feel the spell working, okay?” She says and Spike nods. “Thank you, Glinda.”

Xander watches in amazement. Tara starts chanting words he doesn’t understand. After a moment Tara’s hands start to glow golden. The golden glow gets bigger until it’s completely woven from one hand to the other, surrounding the circle with Spike in the middle. It swirls around the shrunken vampire and seems to completely fill him. Tara keeps chanting easy, joyous words and the glow starts pulsing. In wonder, Xander stares while with each pulse of the glow Spike grows a few inches. Tara’s hands work in rhythm with the pulse, fingers clenching and unclenching, until finally Spike is big again. A last push from Tara’s hands and then she slowly curls in her fingers, making fists. The glow pulls back in synchronicity with that motion until it’s completely gone. She looks up at Spike, signalling the spell is over and blushes heavily. Spike is as naked as the day he was born.

Happily, Spike jumps in the air, testing and stretching his limbs. Everything seems to work just as it did before the whole mini-vamp incident so he sweeps the blonde witch into his arms and hugs her tightly, then twirls her around. “Thank you, Glinda. Thank you sooo much.” He yells effusively. Tara laughs, pleased that he is so happy.

Xander watches the display of joy with a little twist of jealousy in his gut that Spike is hugging Tara for so long. He feels left out. He is happy for Spike, sure, but now he is only Xander again to Spike. Expendable and unimportant. And Spike should put on some clothes. Not everybody needs to see that muscular, flawless body.

Xander brushes away the dark and the weird thoughts and does what the voice inside tells him. “Hey Tara, wanna stay at my apartment tonight?” She glances shyly at him and after a moment’s consideration nods. “If it’s not too much trouble.” Xander shakes his head, waving her doubts away.

“Look, mate, I’m all back to my Big Bad self!” Spike jumps to stand before Xander, grinning widely. Xander does his best to look directly in Spike’s eyes and not at the various interesting body parts that definitely need some clothes – now!
“Congrats, buddy.” Xander utters, seemingly untouched by it all. Spike frowns, not sure what’s making the boy so sad, but then remembers the fight he had with Willow. Red’s gonna suffer for that one! He shrugs and turns to Tara.

“Start packing, Glinda. I’m big again and can help carry all the stuff you want to take with you.” Spike hesitates when Tara tries to look everywhere but at him. “What’s the matter, pet?” Spike looks down at himself. “’K, I can see why me being stalkers gets you all riled up.” He grins an exaggeratedly lascivious smile at her, tongue over teeth and all, then laughs when she blushes almost purple. “You’ve got a way of complimenting a man, girl.” He tells her, laughing. “Got something for covering me up?”

Xander sighs, long-sufferingly. He hadn’t thought about bringing Spike’s clothes. Damn. Tara searches around in her dresser and finally she drags out a pair of black sweats and a grey T-Shirt. Spike looks worriedly at the items. “So sorry, that’s all I have.” She says looking repentant.

“Come on, Spike. It’s only for a few minutes, just get into them so we can leave.” Xander mutters, hating to be around a naked Spike without knowing why exactly that bothers him so much.

After hearing Xander’s grumpy words addressed at Spike, Tara hurries to get her most important personal belongings and some clothes packed.

After a long look at Xander’s unhappy, slouched posture Spike gets into the offered sweats and t-shirt. Looking up at Xander, he finally sees that expression again in the boy’s face that he’s gotten so used to over the last few days: that big, shining smile… which quickly transforms into a hearty laugh at Spike’s expense. The sweats only go down as far as Spike’s calf and sit very low around the waist. The t-shirt is so tight and short it shows off a nice strip of belly skin including the belly button. “You’re the dream model for every gay poster!” Xander quips and seems unable to stop laughing.

“You think so Harris?” Spike asks, devilishly and puts his hand to his hip, thumb disappearing in the sweats, pulling them down even further, showing off even more of that soft, hairless skin and that perfectly formed six-pack. Spike grins at Xander, eyes burning with lust, looking at Xander from under his lashes, teeth gently biting his own bottom lip. “Wanna fuck me, Xander?” Spike whispers, a seductive drawl to his voice.

At least, that makes Xander stop laughing.

Part 15

Xander stops laughing abruptly and pales. “Wanna fuck me, Xander?” echoes in his head accompanied by the instant answer: “yes”. Which, of course, Xander is not ready to deal with at all. Denial is a good thing and so he flips the switch in his head and starts hating Spike wholeheartly again. Not only is Spike not in the least thankful for all the caretaking Xander has done – no – he actually has the nerve to make fun of Xander only seconds after he is back to his old self – which is an evil bastard vampire thing to do.

Xander wishes he could just leave. Go home to his new apartment, sit in front of the TV and drink until he either pukes or falls asleep. He’s deeply hurt, deeply embarrassed and very confused. He needs alone-time which - of course - is the only thing he can’t have right now, because he offered Tara a place to stay and Spike’s clothes are still in his apartment which means, the vampire is coming with them, too. Just great.

“Xander, would you... if y-you dd-don’t like m-me coming w-with...” Tara stutters and stops talking completely when Xander looks at her, dark emotions still on his face.
“What – no, Tara. I don’t mind. Just get your stuff and let’s get out of here!” Xander tries for a grin, but it gets stuck when his gaze is drawn to Spike. The vampire stares at him and the echo of that dreadful question starts up in Xander’s head again. Blushing, Xander turns away, nearly knocking over Tara in the process as she holds out some bags for him to carry.

However, finally, they are ready to leave. Willow is nowhere to be seen, still, Tara can’t shake off the feeling of being followed. Xander leads off, Tara and Spike follow him. Spike wishes for his duster and a cigarette. He feels naked without his usual armour out in the dark streets of this damned town. Xander holds himself stiffly, the anger over Spike’s betrayal pulsating inside him. What the fuck had all this been for if everything’s back to the beginning?

“You need to talk to him.” Tara whispers, so only Spike can hear it. “Take it slow – he’ll get it, eventually.” Head cocked to one side, Spike stares at Tara for a few seconds, then continues watching Xander’s feet stomping forward. He doesn’t know what to say. When he was 3-Inches-small it had all been easy, at least, easier to admit. He had depended on Xander to help him continue his unlife in that form. He’d never have managed on his own. But now, back on his own two feet, he doesn’t need help from pseudo-friends... A memory is triggered by that; Xander admitting that he trusts Spike for whatever reasons. Maybe, Glinda is right.

The rest of the way they go in silence. Tara wonders where they’re going. There had been the fading of a certain darker pressure from Xander’s aura over the last months and she’d assumed that he was getting on with his life and getting out from under the clutches of his parents. Now, she’s curious to find out more about Xander. After all that’s happened, she still feels like an outsider with the Scoobies. Like Spike, she just can’t get into that circle as a fully accepted member. She is still just regarded as “Willow’s girlfriend”. Whether on purpose or not, too often Willow would break into the rare talks one of the Scoobies would have with her and she’d regress to the smiling listener. Especially fierce were those interruptions when Xander was involved. Only Dawn was letting her in fully, though Spike had sent a lot of understanding her way, with his eyes and with his aura.

“We’re here.” Xander says and opens the gate to the backyard. After making sure the gate is securely closed again, Xander leads his companions over to the back entrance and through the workshop. Xander purposely switches just two of those ceiling lights on and keeps the workshop dimly lit. Vampire eyesight still allows Spike to see most of it; the ready and half-ready doll houses, the workbench, the pieces of wood that would be formed to build perfect furniture; while Tara has to concentrate on not stumbling. Spike takes everything in with big eyes. He had only been here when he was shrunken and now it was difficult for him to get used to the new dimensions. Xander moves quickly through the workshop, not wanting them to see a lot of the stuff standing around.

Again, Spike wonders about Xander’s attitude. The boy is exceptionally gifted. His ability to build such wonderful pieces of furniture without an apprenticeship of many years is impressive and nothing to be ashamed of. He shakes his head and presses his lips together tightly. He’s got to talk some sense into the boy. Can’t have him running around like some loser, when he’s so talented, kind and loyal.

Xander opens the door to the apartment and goes in, turning on the lights and calling out the room names whilst pointing to doors. He doesn’t sound completely mad anymore, pride for his workshop, for his apartment creeps into his voice. Way better, Spike thinks and is startled when Tara starts giggling suddenly while crossing the threshold. Xander turns sharply. “What’s so funny?” He barks, immediately hurt by her laughter. “Magic”, she says between helpless giggles. “It tickles!”

Grimacing, but not angry anymore, Xander asks “Magic?”
Tara’s eyes still dance with laughter. “Yes, Magic. It’s so easy and so effective. It prevents anybody with the will to hurt you from entering here. Very effective and so pure.” She giggles again. “I want to get to know the witch who did this, please.”
Xander shrugs, “I could ask Garld. Guess she’s behind this.” He smiles, genuinely pleased by the concern Garld must feel for him to have set up a magical barrier to protect him. Spike had entered after Tara without hesitation and nothing had happened, Xander thinks, maybe the vampire really had changed... or perhaps the barrier would only react to physical hurt and, with the chip, Spike couldn’t do any physical damage so he could enter without restrictions... He’ll ask Garld as soon as he gets the chance.

“Let’s put this stuff in the living room”, Xander says and leads the way.
“Wow – these curtains are... impressive.” Tara says and stares in awe at the dark red velvet, then goes over to touch it. She shoves the curtains apart and looks outside through the big windows. “The view is great. You can look over a huge part of Sunnydale. Isn’t that Restfield? Can you see Spike’s...”
“So, where’d you leave my duster?” Spike asks, interrupting her, not meeting Xander’s eyes.
“Bedroom cupboard”, comes the short answer from the boy, who then turns angrily and disappears into the kitchen. Great.
“Don’t you dare to leave!” Tara mouthes at Spike and tries a Willow-look. It doesn’t fit her. He shrugs and goes into the bedroom in search of his clothes. The first thing he finds, though, is the doll house Xander made him which had been his home for the last couple of days.

Tara follows Xander into the kitchen. “Why don’t we eat something together? I mean, I’d like to spend some time with you, you, my friends, to... to - not be alone for a while, you know?” Tara says, so fast the words blur into each other and she nearly rolls her eyes at how ridiculous she sounds even to herself.

“He can stay.” Xander sighs deeply. “I wouldn’t throw him out, you know, just couldn’t do that to him. Even back to his normal size he’s helpless and the baddies outside are just waiting to get him. I mean, that’s what brought us here. The vampires that attacked us the night of the shrinkage – it was a trap. They were only trying to kill Spike.” Opening the fridge and staring into it without really seeing anything, Xander thinks about that night, thinks about how sad he felt, being sure Spike had been killed. He likes the guy, can’t deny that. “If he just wasn’t such a jerk!” Xander complains and Tara giggles.

“It isn’t easy for him either – adjusting to this.” Tara says and shoves Xander away from the fridge. “You’ll get a cold standing in front of an open fridge too long.” She chides him, not meaning it seriously, and starts sorting through the limited offer of food inside the fridge. “We only moved in a couple of days ago”, Xander apologises for the lack of choice of food. Grinning over the “we” Xander used, Tara closes the fridge door. “Don’t worry. Let’s just order Pizza.”
“And ice cream.” Xander says and hugs her softly. “Yeah, and ice cream, a lot of ice cream.” Hesitantly at first, Tara hugs Xander back and tries not to think too hard about her own problems.

In the other room Spike sits on the bed and looks in astonishment at the doll house. He can’t believe only a few hours ago he fitted perfectly in that minature world. It seems like a dream, a bad dream however. Not everything was bad. Things were easier, that’s for sure. Xander could read every wish from his eyes and, if not, Spike could tell him without hesitation. Now, everything is complicated. The intimacy they shared is nothing more than friendship – Spike should have known.

Reaching inside the doll house Spike takes out the chair. He caresses the smooth leather and the dark wood. Really fine craftsmanship. Xander can be proud, Broum can be proud to have such a talent working for him. He sets the chair back and starts to hunt for his clothes. Finally Spike locates them, T-Shirt, Shirt, jeans, duster, his socks and boots. The clothes are neatly folded, albeit a bit dusty and crinkled-up – it would do. Better than what he was wearing right now for sure.

Chewing on his bottom lip, Spike’s thoughts swirl and circle until they focus on one sentence: He wants Xander. He gets out of the ridiculous short shirt and puts on the black shirt. It stretches tightly over hard muscles and a sudden memory of drinking Xander’s blood rushes through him like a lightning bolt. He sucks in unneeded air. Bloody hell, boy, you’re a nummy treat. Always knew that.

So he wants Xander, nothing wrong with that. He slides out of the sweats and puts on his jeans. Nice boy, nice body, nice home, good job. He wants Xander. Socks on and boots laced, Spike gets up agitatedly. He was sure, on some level Xander wanted Spike too, he just didn’t know about it yet. No problem at all, Spike would make him see. He’d persuade him to see the rightness of them being together. He shrugs on his red button up, leaves it open. First thing’s first – he needs to stay tonight, and probably for a lot of nights, here in Xander’s lovely apartment with the enormous heavy curtains that fit so well with the dark doors and heavy drawers and cupboards. Spike sighs. He needs a reason to stay. Think, Spike, think. You’re good at this. Damn, there they are already back.

“Look – I..“, he begins, but is completely taken aback by Xander’s reaction. The boy stops, rooted to the floor, one weak hand pointing vaguely at Spike. Xander’s jaw agape, his eyes roaming over Spike.
“Guess you like this better? At least you’re not laughing your bloody ass off this time.” Spike mumbles and knows he won’t get an answer. Things would go easier than he thought. Xander already has the hots for him, he just can’t admit it. Spike will help him with that. What are friends for anyway…

Part 16

“Good to see you back to your old self again.” Tara says, a half-mocking twinkle to her eyes which Spike hasn’t seen before. “How about we order some Pizza and watch some TV?” She asks Spike and he agrees without hesitation. Xander can’t believe he’s such an idiot, standing there on the threshold, unmoving, staring at Spike dumbly. He feels heat creep into his cheeks – great - embarrassment is his most hated emotion. It feels so… embarrassing! He’d roll his eyes at himself if he wasn’t still transfixed by the sight of the ex-mini-vampire all big and bad again. Whoa, he can’t remember Spike ever looking so manly, strong, proud, predatory, sexy… Sexy somehow does fit, even though he doesn’t think that is an attribute *he* should use to describe the undead. Whatever, Tara and Spike are talking movies and he’s gonna help them decide now.

“No video-store around here and isn’t that great. Let’s stick to the Xander collection: Star Trek it is.” He interrupts the discussion and isn’t Tara thankfully. Spike wanting to watch “Legends of the Fall” is just too scary. Spike shrugs, but internally pouts. There goes his chance to have Xander melting in his arms from a romantic movie. Sceptically, he looks at Xander – maybe that wasn’t such a good plan. He can’t imagine Xander melting from a romantic movie, Xander would rather fall asleep in his arms and drool on his shirt. Still, that’d mean Xander in his arms... no, Spike, bloody stupid plan.

They discuss, decide and then order Pizza and some spicy chicken wings, too. Spike stretches out on the bed and watches TV, well, he zaps through the channels quickly without really seeing anything. His mind is on his time as 3-Inches-Vampire again – and he does not mean that one time when he’d tried ice-bathing in Canada – how terribly strenuous and frustrating a simple thing like zapping was. Gives you some perspective, this experience, but still, one he could have lived without.

Spike is bored and he doesn’t know how to proceed. He can’t court Xander like some chick – and he can’t just clap him on the shoulder, smile and then fuck him in the alley. Spike sighs audibly and puts his hand through his hair. Oh bloody hell!

Xander watches, amused, out of the corner of his eye, how Spike discovers the chaotic mess of hair on his head. As a little vampire Spike just looked cute all... spiked up, really, but back to his normal size and in his old clothes, in his bed with his hair all messed up he looks... sexy. And there it is again, the little word a man shouldn’t think about another man, at least, not about men without their own TVShows. Though Spike is sexy enough for a few TVShows, maybe even his own channel and... this goes somewhere beyond Xander’s ability to control or deny it. Spike is sexy. He has to admit that. Bad, dark vampire with bed-hair and eyes that could make you burn inside, make you...

“Xander?” Tara looks concerned at the boy who’d tuned out their conversation about decorations a couple of minutes ago and, from there on, started turning a nice shade of red before paling again quickly. “Xander, are you okay?”

“Huh?” Xander starts, looks around unsure and doesn’t meet Tara’s eyes. “I just... I... sorry, Tara, I zoned out on you. What were you saying again?” Unhappily, Xander stares at his toes. Spike, of course, uses the moment to go by them, brushing against Xander - as if - accidentally. “Hope, you’ve got half-decent gel in your bathroom, pup!” Spike says and disappears from the room.

“Pup?” Xander squeaks and Tara smiles.
“Xander, look, it’s okay if you like...”
“Pizza?” He feels his heart speeding up. He’s not gonna have this conversation.
“No, not what I meant and it’s not here yet, anyway.”
“I could look...”
“No. You listen to me, now.” Tara juts her chin out and puts her hands on her hips. “It’s okay if you like, ahm, like men.”
“Oh – that – no. Not me. I am a boobs man.” He stares pointedly at Tara’s heavy breasts. “Look, like boobs. Yours are – wow – big.” Xander keeps staring and Tara blushes purple. “Nice boobs.” Xander nods convincingly to himself, than looks at Tara’s face. “Oh, oh! I... sorry. I didn’t, you know, mean it. I mean, your boobs are nice but you like boobs, too, look we’re like sisters, we both like boobs?” Xander puts his hands in front of his face and mumbles “Oh my god.”
“They’re semantics.” Tara giggles.
“What? Would say that, they’re way too, you know, big, to be semantics.” Xander gestures weighing heavy breasts with his hands.
“No, I mean, it’s semantics, if there are boobs, a pussy or a cock.”
“Oh, don’t let Spike hear you call his cock semantics.” Xander nods, eyes wide. “Actually, don’t ever call a man’s best friend semantics, at all.”
Giving up, Tara shakes her head, smiling desperately. “It doesn’t matter who you love. The love is what matters.” There are tears gathering in her eyes and then, suddenly, there is Spike and he holds Tara in his arms, hugging her just enough. Otherwise she might have fallen to pieces at their feet.

“I didn’t...” Xander stumbles. Seeing Spike holding her, caring, makes him feel warm inside. “I know, don’t worry. She’s strong, will be back on her feet in no time. Won’t you, luv?” Spike murmurs and strokes Tara’s hair while she continues sobbing into his shoulder.

There’s a ring at the door and Xander uses the oportunity to leave the emotion-laden situation. The Pizza Boy stands outside the gate, waiting patiently for Xander to come. Jorge’s Pizza –another one of those many shops Xander worked for when he was still undecided whether he was good at anything at all – they have new uniforms. Xander grins.
“Nice jacket!” Xander comments, takes the Pizzas and the box with the chicken wings. There is a gratis bottle of “the cheapest wine in the world” because their order was over 25 dollars.
“Thanks, it’s a lifesaver.” The boy grins over the 5 dollars tip and runs back to his dirty brown car. The little golden crosses all over the red jacket sparkle in the light from the street lamp.

The Pizzas smell delicious and Xander hurries back up the stairs. Spike and Tara are sitting on the floor on a blanket and Tara smiles, listening to Spike who is telling some tale about an especially exciting fight. When he enters with the Pizzas, chicken wings and the wine, they both jump up to help him set everything down. Knives and glasses are fetched from the kitchen and, smiling at each other, they clink glasses filled with “the cheapest wine in the world” before they start to eat. The wine doesn’t taste that bad...

Taking a break after three quarters of his huge Pizza, Xander watches Spike, transfixed, while the vampire eats a chicken wing. Spike is totally fixated on the food, his lips and teeth work frantically to get all the flesh and the crispy skin. His fingers are greasy and from time to time his tongue darts out, licking the grease from his fingers. Spike moans softly, delighted by the taste of the spicy chicken and Xander feels this warmth spreading inside him again which focuses in his groin, making his cock jump slightly. Oh my god, he is turned on by Spike! As if on cue, Spike throws the bones back in the box and sticks his index and ring fingers in his mouth to clean them off. His eyes snap up and blue eyes meet the intense gaze of brown ones. Fuck, Xander thinks, gasping for air when his cock jumps again violently, leaving him without any chance of denial.

Spike doesn’t avert his eyes. He stares at Xander, sinks into eyes full of swirling emotions. For a few seconds he’s unsure how to handle the situation, then a wave of pheromones assaults his senses. He swallows, then intensifies his gaze, telling Xander everything about desire and lust with his eyes.
Xander just can’t look away. The blue of Spike’s eyes darkens and there is so much promise in Spike’s look, Xander is interested, excited, curious and scared all in one.

Tara feels the tension and watches the men staring at each other. Their auras are pulsating for and with each other. She wouldn’t go so far as to say, these two were made for each other, but they’d fit very well. If Xander can overcome his inhibitions.
However, Spike has to be careful, Xander’s feelings are strong, his heart loves deeply but his self-esteem is fragile. A partner like Spike, so dominant and confident, sometimes is too much and a person like Xander can easily get lost in the shadows.

Part 17

Tara wakes up first. There is a cool, pale foot on her shoulder. She sits up and looks at the unfamiliar surroundings. Ah, Xander’s apartment. The sun shines into the living room, the curtain isn’t fully closed, but there is no danger to Spike here in the bed.

That first long eye contact yesterday evening had finally been broken by Xander who fled to the bathroom. Spike had looked at Tara who smiled at him supportively. He shrugged and ate another a slice of Xander’s Pizza who, of course, noticed it when he came back and the name calling started. With it, a lot of laughter filled the air. Spike and Xander entertained Tara, mocking each other vividly while (for an bystander obviously) flirting with each other. There is so much familiarity to their banter; Tara wonders why they’d never noticed before.

Since the TV stood in the bedroom, they’d wandered over there after the meal and watched some stupid comedy shows. The stress-free entertainment, laughter and light-hearted banter had done all of them good. Their full to bursting bellies had soon made them all tired and finally they’d fallen asleep on the bed together. Stranger things have happened... really.

Tara nearly can’t suppress the laughter when she looks at the other part of the bed. Spike has curled into Xander’s body, his head under Xander’s chin. Xander has in turn put his arms around the vampire, one long leg stretched over Spike’s. They were just too cute.

Spike wakes up when he notices Tara’s warm hand putting his foot under the blanket. He decides to continue feigning to be asleep. He doesn’t want to leave the warm embrace of Xander’s body. Too soon Xander is going to wake anyway and he bets the boy’s going to throw him out in full panic mode.

Tara leaves the bed, grabs a bag in the living room, then goes to the bathroom. Minutes later, the shower springs to life and he can hear her muffled sobs. He feels for her, he’s experienced all kinds of heartache himself already and it’s really nothing you would wish someone like Tara go through at all. Seeing her suffer makes him want to console her. Just like seeing Xander makes him want to fuck him, have him. He feels his cock stirring with these thoughts and sighs. Xander groans in his sleep, disturbed. Not long and he’ll wake, just a few more minutes.

After making herself halfway presentable, Tara comes back into the living room and sees Xander groggily move his hand to Spike’s hair, fingering the short strands before opening his eyes with a start.

Spike enjoys the short moment of cuddling before Xander fully wakes up. Xander’s heart runs a thousand miles a minute. Spike hesitates, should he “wake up” too or keep on faking sleep. Better to keep still and silent – even if he inwardly cringes from this cowardice.

A man is in his double bed. Could happen, he doesn’t have a couch and the bed is big enough. His hand is tangled in short blond hair. Could happen, he likes blond, could be any girl’s hair. Somebody is curled into his body. Could happen, could be any girl’s body. Except it isn’t.
Spike, a very manly vampire is in his bed and he’s got his hand in Spike’s hair and it’s Spike’s strong, sexy, undead body his arms are wrapped around.
Whoever said “deal with a situation you can’t deal with one fact after another” has never, ever been in such a situation!!!

At least, they aren’t naked and he doesn’t feel sticky and hey, Tara was there, too. He remembers that much. Good. Three friends sharing a bed, no big deal at all. Everything’s great. He’s even done that with Willow and Buffy once. Wow, he’d had hundreds of wicked fantasies after that. Just why isn’t he cuddled up to Tara? And why is Spike cuddling with him? And why does he like it? He could cry, really cry over so much betrayal. His own body is betraying him by liking this, this... cuddling with Spike!

He remembers Tara’s words from the evening before: It doesn’t matter who you love, it’s the love that matters. Just great, she’s got an evil plan, trying to set him up! But Spike is a demon, he is undead, and he is a man – isn’t it weird, that the manly parts are only placed third in the panic-scale?

It’s not that bad, really. You can have a lot of fun with a man. At least, millions of girls and women chose a man to be with, they can’t all be wrong, can they? A man doesn’t want to talk relationship in the middle of the night or after sex. Oh, sex, he’s not entirely sure how that’s supposed to work. He can imagine the kissing part - but where does he leave his hands if there aren’t boobs to seek out? He’s gotta ask Spike --- actually, that is the last thing he wants to talk with Spike about.

Slowly, but not unkindly, Xander untangles himself from Spike. All the time he keeps his eyes shut. He doesn’t need even more proof of how sexy bedhair!Spike is.
At a secure distance with his feet on the floor and his back to Spike, he can open his eyes and greet the day. Tara is in the living room, watching him curiously. He wants to say good morning to her, but “I am not freaking.” is what comes out of his mouth. Tara smiles her big, understanding smile. “Of course not. There’s nothing to freak out about.”
“There isn’t?” Puzzled, Xander stares at her.
“You fell asleep. You’re not responsible for what your body does when you sleep.”
“Right!” He grins. “My body is responsible, not me.”

Faking sleep is getting harder and harder for Spike over the conversation of Xander and Tara, he bites his lip to prevent himself from chuckling.

“Yeah, your subconscious is in control of your body and tries to fulfil the wishes and desires you deny yourself when awake.”
“Yes, my subconscious has all the control, making me do things I don’t allow myself to do when awake... hey! That is not a good thing!” Xander stares at the giggling Tara. “That is not fair. You’re an evil girl, Tara!” With that, he - half joking, half in earnest - flees from the living room into the bathroom. Why are things so complicated? Or better, why is it so hard to admit certain things to oneself?

“You’re a mean girl, Glinda.” Spike says, as soon as Xander leaves the room. Tara smiles cheekily. “Thought you were asleep.”
“Of course you did.” He grins, not taking her seriously. “Harris’ getting his knickers all in a twist over some bit of man on man snogging.”
“Guess William felt the same... confusion about it once upon a time.” Tara replies and keeps on smiling evenly. Spike swallows hard on being brought back to a series of memories he’d buried deeply inside him. In addition, he is shocked that Tara has so efficiently shut him up and made him understand what Harris is going through this moment.

“Ah, bloody hell. It’s not as it was then. Liking a bloke was... unthinkable. You couldn’t meet a girl without some stupid chaperone. William was, I was, we’ve been stupidly romantic – Angelus taught us what’s what.”
“But you’ve been a demon – you didn’t mind the...” Tara trails off when Spike’s expression hardens.
“I am still a demon, nothing’s gonna change that.” Spike jumps up from the bed, his inner turmoil obvious. He shrugs on his duster. “Rape and torture isn’t anything a demon enjoys - if it’s done to it.” He makes to leave, carefully avoiding the sunlight in the living area of the room, when Xander comes back.

“Where’re you going.”
“Out.”
“Geez... sunlight?”
“Sewer entry in that work space of yours.”
“You’ll be back?”
“Not my friggin’ mom you are.”
“Why do I care anyway? It’s not like you’re worth it, is it?” Xander shrugs, not able to keep his disappointment of Spike leaving from making ugly words come out of his mouth.

Without another word Spike stalks down the stairs, swallowing repeatedly to get the mix of anger, disappointment and hurt down his throat that’s making his eyes sting. Finally, at the sewer entrance he rips open the lid and jumps in it and for a moment he feels like Jesus when he found out he could walk on water. Then the absolute frustration catches up with him and releases itself in a primal growl from the depth of his chest.

Broum sees the vampire hovering over the open entrance of the sewer tunnel and flinches at the growl that rises from the vampire. He’s still William the Bloody and, for him as a demon, a real threat. The chip wouldn’t prevent any damage. However, he never counted himself a coward, so he speaks: “Nothing comes in, nothing gets out. It’s a spell to prevent us, this, from damage.”

“Lift it!”
“Can’t. Had someone set it up. You’ll have to wait until nightfall if you don’t wanna burn.”
“Is that William?” Garld yells from the shop and comes through the door only seconds later. “Oh William – why don’t you stay here for a while – I have so many questions. Oh, I got some blood for you, too.”

Just barely, Spike catches himself before remembering how Broum and Garld had taken him in and supported Xander. He can’t go anywhere anyway and it’s his chance to get away from Xander and Glinda for a while since both of them think he’s gone already.

“You don’t happen to have some booze, too?” He grins and goes over to Garld, then puts an arm around her. “William the bloody at your service.”

Broum grins and follows them into the shop.

Part 18

“Thought, you were gone.” Xander squeaks, when he finds Spike, Garld and Broum sitting in the small kitchenette downstairs.
“So did I, mate.” Spike flips and shrugs, demonstrating disinterest by turning away.
“I’m going.” Xander says, unsure why he feels so relieved that Spike’s still around and, at the same time, is bothered by Spike’s presence. “I mean, I work. I’ll be back, I mean, at work in the back... urgh” Frustrated, he turns and flees into the workshop.

“’S got his knickers all in a twist. Didn’t do a thing to him.” Spike says to Garld and Broum who look at him amused. “Not planning to do anything to him anyway. I’m out of here as soon as the sun sets.”

“Course you are. Someone could think you’re all tamed and kept on leash, couldn’t they.” Broum fills Spike’s shot glass again. The vampire downs it without hesitation and holds it out again. “Tamed! Pffft.” He scoffs. Garld grins at Broum evilly before speaking: “Someone could think you’d a pet human at your beck and call – domestic luxury. Gotten into the slayer’s inner circle – gotten impunity...” Broum bites the inside of his cheeks to keep from laughing. His wife is evil when she wants something. Spike downs another shot clearly thinking deeply about the options this situation offers him.

“Maybe –there’s just one failure in your plan. Boy’s not going to want me staying here.” Spike says and rolls his eyes at Garld. She didn’t think she could get him this easily, did she?
“Boy has been awfully quiet and lonely before this” Broum holds up his hand, pointy finger and thumb showing three Inches “thing. I rather like him all freaked out rather than depressed. I can find things for you to do, get some money for yourself, have an excuse to be around...”

“Nah” Spike holds out his glass, gets it filled and then drinks the whisky down before setting the glass on the table forcefully. “I’m going to go tell him the good news. Thanks for the liquid courage.” Spike winks at Garld and stands up and leaves for the back room in one fluent movement.

When Spike comes stomping through the door, Xander can’t help but feel threatened. Spike’s impressive when he’s determined, all hard edges and sharp movements. Before Xander can react at all Spike has pressed him up on the workbench, his slim hips between Xander’s thighs, his hands on the work bench, wrists touching Xander’s hips. Xander’s breath stutters when Spike leans in, eyes straying down to Xander’s lips before meeting Xander’s eyes again. “Tell you something so you listen closely, alright?” Xander swallows, hard, throat suddenly gone dry, reduced to nodding dumbly. “I’m staying. I’m staying here, I’m staying with you.” Xander’s eyes open wide in disbelief – he’s just not sure whether Spike’s staying feels like a good or a bad thing. “You... what makes you say that... I mean...” Spike interrupts him with a hard frown, eyes going to slits for a second.
“You want to know why?” Spike asks, voice like a sword, blue eyes burning. Xander’s heart finds a way to beat even faster, he can feel his palms getting wet and his body starts shaking. Fight or flight – a life altering moment. He nods, barely.

Spike smirks, eyes flickering gold for a fraction of time. “There is exactly one reason and only one reason. Never,” Spike growls when Xander’s eyes look down. Xander adjusts, staring, sinking into the emotional swirl of gold and blue. “Never let anybody tell you differently. I stay because,” Spike grabs Xander’s hips roughly, yanks Xander against his body, lips only an inch away from Xander’s so the boy feels Spike’s breath puffing over them. “Because you – are – mine. Mine. Understood?”

Xander whimpers, overwhelmed, eyes full of scared relief and it’s enough of an answer for Spike. He leans in and puts his lips to Xander’s mouth, tongue demanding entry, roughly and getting it. Xander moans into the kiss and his arm comes up – involuntarily – to cup around Spike’s neck and pull him deeper into himself. Hardness grinds against him and for a second he feels like he might panic but then he feels his own hardness wanting just the same and that must be okay then. Spike has a strong grip on his hips and it feels just right, not too hard but hard enough and he wonders just when exactly he decided it was alright to be Spike’s.

“I want to taste you.” Spike murmurs in the kiss, takes away his tongue that feels so incredible – cool – against Xander’s. Xander complains with noises, not with words and Spike’s tongue comes back, stroking inside his mouth like a hard shaft could ... – all thoughts leave when Xander feels Spike’s fingers opening his pants, pulling down his zipper, they find their way under his boxers and close around Xander who arches upwards. “Let me taste you, luv.” Spike nearly begs and pulls his mouth from Xander’s hot lips. “Okay, okay, yeah.” Xander breathes in time with each thrust of Spike’s fist and lets his head fall back, turns it a little to the side, trusting, baring his throat to the vampire.

Unaware of that display of trust, that invitation, Spike follows with his mouth to where his eyes are fixated already. Unable to process the feeling, expecting the biting pain, Xander cries out when his hardness is engulfed in cool, wet silk. His head snaps forward, looking down into blue eyes burning with lust and want and need, sharp cheekbones that stick out even more now Spike’s mouth is working, sucking, licking on him.

Involuntarily, Xander thrusts forward, he can’t help it, but Spike doesn’t draw back, doesn’t pull away, just takes him in deeper. Xander’s hand tangles in the short blonde hair and instead of pushing Spike back as intended, because that can’t be comfortable to take him inside this deeply, he holds Spike’s head and arches upwards, burying the vampire’s nose into his black crisp curls and comes, shooting down Spike’s throat, one, two, three-four times.

Xander is still trying to get his bearings while Spike zips him up.

“Your taste is delicious, Xander.” Spike purrs and kisses him again. Xander can taste himself in Spike’s mouth. “Spike, I...” Xander starts between kisses and Spike calms him. “Ssh, boy, you’re mine. Nothing that can change that and you won’t want to because you know it’s the truth.” Spike whispers and looks intently into Xander’s eyes. Beneath the obvious worry and fear Spike can see curiosity and longing. It won’t be long until Xander will understand too, that he belongs to Spike now.

“I have to think about this.” Xander says and tries to put some distance between them. Spike takes a step back, lets Xander jump down from the work bench. “I can’t just... turn gay!” The boy squeaks, embarrassment reddening his face. Spike chuckles. He had thought about a thousand arguments Xander might come up with at this point of their relationship like vampire, undead, soulless, tried to kill him and his friends, tried it often, everything – but not the issue of being straight, gay, bi or whatever.

“This is not funny in the least, Spike!” Xander yells and gets into Spike’s face, grabs the lapels of the vampire’s duster and shakes him. Spike’s hands automatically go to Xander’s hips, pulling the boy flush against him and suddenly Xander’s arms are over Spike’s shoulders, holding the vampire in an intimate embrace. Xander stares down into Spike’s face, the blue eyes sparkling with challenge and lust. Spike grinds his still hard shaft against Xander’s body and moans, lips falling open, irises darkening. The sense of power Xander possesses over this supernatural, mighty creature brings headiness. Then there is a flash of memory... Spike’s lips which were just minutes ago wrapped around his cock, giving so much pleasure to him, are now waiting for him. The tip of Spike’s tongue peeks out, wetting lips for the inevitable just before Xander – carefully – takes his own to Spike’s mouth to seek out a completely new world of sexual entertainment.

***

Unnoticed by the kissing couple, Garld and Broum are watching them through the left-open door. “See, they’re kissing again and this time Xander initiated it!” She whispers at her husband who glares, teasing her: “Wouldn’t call the things they did before ‘kissing’ even if lips were definitely involved.” Garld hides her giggles in her hand and Broum rolls his eyes. “You’re a bad girl, Garli, even in your old age.” Broum whispers in her ear, using that voice and Garld smiles, eyes twinkling. “You should know. The older the better.” Broum growls at her and grabs her, pulling her away into the office. “Your office now. Or do I have to pull you by your hair?”

Part 19

A couple of days later, they help Tara move her stuff to another dorm. She shares her room with a shy girl who has more technical literature than cosmetica and Spike approves, after some not so subtle sniffing around. Amilia, so Tara says the shy girl is called, is totally freaked out by the gay Billy-Idol-Wannabe and flees as fast as she can.

Spike in the meantime has managed to move his few personal belongings into Xander’s apartment and come to an arrangement with Garld and Broum. Just a bit of neighbourhood patrol and shop/house protection, something Spike actually likes to do.

There hasn’t been anything happening between Spike and Xander since that incident on the workbench. Spike explained it away with Tara’s presence, but now she’s gone and Xander still hasn’t made a move or let Spike make one. Xander busies himself with all kinds of stuff and they’re practically never alone. He even manages to go to Buffy’s house and lets her stomp over him a few times for helping Spike regain his normal size. It has taken all of Spike’s self control (and rememberance of the chip) to not lash out at her. Xander stank of resigned disappointment all night. He didn’t let Spike make it better.

Tonight though, Spike will get more of his nummy treat. No excuses allowed.

The walk back from Tara’s new dorm room is silent. Both of them are strung tight with expectations and Xander clears his throat twice, but doesn’t manage to start a conversation. Spike’s terrible at waiting. He wants to just fuck the boy into the ground and ask consent later. All this emotional crap is pretty redundant when the facts are clear. Xander is his and Xander will want him just as much as he wants Xander. Spike has learned a few things about humans and he knows they tend to get rather loud when they’re disagreeing. He doesn’t want Xander afraid – he wants him insane with lust and precome-dripping-hard for him all the time.

Going up the stairs with Spike behind him feels like the last walk a man takes, the walk towards execution. Xander’s body hums with excitement and lust but he’s so damn scared at the same time that he’s shaking. Spike can’t and won’t ever be some kind of one-night-stand. Spike is an all consuming tasmanian devil that brings chaos to everything until you don’t know which way is up. Saying yes to Spike is saying yes to Spike for forever. He’s not sure he wants to be a vampire – ever – but maybe he’s thinking this through a bit too far already.

Xander sticks the key into the lock and opens the door, goes inside the apartment and towards the drawn curtains without switching on any light. It’s dark outside and he likes to see the stars and the moon just as much as he likes to feel the sun on his skin. Spike’s behind him, breathing on his neck, before Xander lets go of the thick velvet material. Xander shivers and stops breathing while his heart hammers out a staccato of longing. He stares at the moon while Spike continues just breathing on his skin.

Spike stands close enough to soak up Xander’s heat, but he doesn’t touch him at all. He listens to Xander’s pounding heart and the blood flowing fast through the boy’s veins. He inhales the boy’s scent deeply; fear and longing coated with desire. It takes every bit of will power from Spike to wait for Xander’s resolve.

Now or never, Xander thinks and he starts breathing again, pants actually, hitched and fast. “Come here.” He finally says, voice supernaturally low, and fumbles for Spike’s hand without looking.

Spike closes in, hands on Xander’s hipbones, his already hard shaft grinding into Xander’s backside. He’s not letting the boy go again, not after this. He’s said yes and Spike’ll make sure he won’t regret it. Spike breathes, his chest expanding against Xander’s back, matching the fast rhythm of the boy’s panting. Slowly, Spike dips his head to the side, kisses Xander’s neck and flicks his tongue out, tasting skin sweet like chocolate. Xander moans, a short helpless, lusty noise from the back of his throat.

After that, things get out of control and Xander is as frantic as Spike to get skin on skin. They pull off each other’s clothes and curse when buttons don’t open fast enough. Soon, they’re on the floor, the carpet is scratchy on Xander’s knees and elbows. Xander is hungry for Spike’s mouth and the vampire revels in the warmth spreading from the body above him. They’re naked and rubbing against each other, seeking friction and fulfilment and there’s this point, which Xander wants to get closer to, but doesn’t know how and his helplessness frustrates him, makes him bite hard at Spike’s lips and push down on Spike’s shoulders even more.

A warning growl from Spike and another, shortly before the vampire flips them so Xander’s back is on the carpet. Xander’s breath catches, his lust-darkened eyes fixing on golden ones above him, supernatural features highlighted by pale moonlight. “Take me, please. Take me.”, Xander whispers and Spike hears the desperation in it, hears the want to give up choices.
“You’re mine.” Spike states, this time it’s even more true than two days ago. “Mine forever.” He repeats and holds the boy with just enough force to make Xander feel safe, bound.

“I need you... I want to...” Xander doesn’t feel ashamed anymore, doesn’t feel wrong or gay. Everything is brand new and he doesn’t know how to voice what he wants, that’s all.

“Oh, we’ll get there. Don’t worry, pet.” Spike smiles, and nips at Xander’s collarbone with human teeth, making the boy shudder under him. His hand sneaks out and finds lube in his duster’s pocket. The click of the cap is unnaturally loud and there is fear ice-cold in Xander’s belly but Spike feels that, soothes him. “Going to make you feel good, pet. Don’t worry. Trust me.”

“I trust you.” Xander whispers and makes Spike look at him. “I trust you.” He says again because he needs to say that. Spike needs to know that. The smile Spike gives him is beautiful and the kiss that follows takes away every thought from his mind but more.

Xander wants more and Spike offers everything and they’re both taking all they can have.

Fingers find that place and beg to be let in and Xander’s moans and breathy whimpers ask them in. Two fingers soon become three and Xander hasn’t felt this vulnerable and protected at the same time ever before. He claws on Spike’s shoulders when the vampire finally settles between his spread thighs and guides himself inside.

For a second, it nearly hurts. It’s a slow burn that grows to unknown pleasure with each following stroke. Sometimes Spike hits him so deeply inside that Xander explodes in delight and groans frantically, wanting more of that exactly. He holds onto Spike and urges him on, with kisses and bites and scratches and heels digging in, Xander makes the vampire pump harder and stronger inside his body until they’re both losing control completely and unload their lust.

The moon creeps from its hiding place beneath some clouds and lights up the room, showing stunned awe on both their faces. It’s Xander who wraps his hand around Spike’s neck, plays with the hair there, then pulls Spike down and kisses him – slowly.
Spike pushes his tongue deeply inside Xander’s mouth, tastes true devotion and satisfaction for the first time in his whole existence and his non-beating heart feels warm.

They make it into the shower with each other’s help. Carpet burns are a bitch, even with vampire healing, and Spike kneels down to make Xander’s ass cheeks feel better. His cool hands are soothing even under the hot stream of water. Spike’s tongue is wicked and Xander shoots his load against the tiles after only a couple of minutes.

All the pulling on Spike’s hair has gotten all the gel-stuff out of it and when they’re lying side by side in bed, the TV’s light flickering bluely over them, Xander plays with the natural curls at the nape of Spike’s neck until the vampire falls asleep – or pretends to by stopping all movement and breathing. Not long after that, Xander’s eyelids can’t withstand gravity any longer and he barely wonders for a second why it doesn’t feel weird to fall asleep with an undead, manly body curled around him.

Waking up doesn’t feel weird either, does feel good actually and the smile Spike directs at him is genuine before it gets dirty. Xander has no time to get embarrassed because Spike engulfs his morning wood deeply in his mouth and makes him pant. Fingers come to make it feel even better and Xander spreads willingly for his lover’s hardness, welcoming him deeply inside him – body and heart. The kisses they share this morning are just like the thrusts – slow and intimate.

Xander gasps the moment Spike touches his hard shaft and comes when he feels Spike pulsating inside him. He shudders, taking in the golden eyes and the distorted face of the vampire that has imbedded himself inside him in nearly every possible way.

There is work to do and Xander leaves after a thousand goodbye kisses, fearing to lose this intimacy with Spike. He doesn’t need to worry. As soon as he’s back in the early afternoon - after enough teasing from Garld and Broum to last a lifetime about his smile – Spike drags him back into bed and continues where they stopped that morning.

***

Neither of them is surprised when the desperate call comes from Giles the next afternoon, asking them to bring Willow to a coven in England where she can learn control of her magic abilities. However, they are surprised over the fact that Willow asked for help. Looks like Tara had indeed been right with her decision to abandon Willow. Only this way has the redhead realised at the last moment, how important Tara is to her.

Part 20

Giles pulled some strings and so it comes that Spike, Xander and Willow are sitting in a closed-off first class compartment of a plane going to London. Well, Willow isn’t so much sitting as hanging in the seat, sleeping (sedated) and unmoving (bound tightly).

Xander keeps staring at Willow as if she’ll wake up any moment and open her mouth, spitting filthy things at them for separating her from Tara. Everything had been fine just an hour before take-off when Willow had suddenly panicked, overreacted and started throwing around curses and threats. While Giles distracted Willow with counter spells, Tara moved in and sedated Willow with a syringe the classic way. Seconds later Willow was out and everybody felt palpably relieved. Tara seemed sad and hopeful in equal amounts and kissed the sleeping Willow on her forehead. “You’re gonna be okay. You’ll learn to balance and anchor yourself. When you’re back we’ll make a fresh start. You’ll see, it’s gonna be perfect. Promise.”

The compartment has two pairs of seats facing each other. Spike chooses the seat across from Willow, legs sprawling, carelessly blocking the space between the seats. When Xander tries to step over them Spike pulls him onto his lap.

“Spike, let me up!” Xander complains half-heartedly. He hasn’t stopped smiling since that night and he can’t contain it now either.

“You’re gorgeous when you smile like that, pet.” Spike says and his fingers find their way into Xander’s shaggy brown hair. Spike pulls him down for a deep kiss.

“Stop it. What if Willow wakes up?” Xander struggles to get up from the vampire’s lap, but the strong fingers keep holding him down by his hip. “Or they could see us through the window!”

Chuckling, Spike indicates with the fingers of one hand to the window. “That little thing? They’re lucky if they manage to look at the right window at all!” He says and yells “OW!” suddenly. Xander had used his distraction to bite his other arm in an attempt to loosen his grip.

“What the hell, whelp!” Spike scowls and grabs the youth even harder, while his hand goes to the bite to rub it. At that moment, Xander leans forward and connects hard with the vampire’s elbow.

“Ow!” Xander whines and touches his lip. “Damn, it’s bleeding.” Xander mumbles and darts his tongue out to catch the droplets slowly building at the corner of his mouth. “Spike, you don’t have a Kleenex, do you?” Xander asks and lifts his gaze, meeting golden eyes, blazing with lust staring at him. “Erm, Spi-ke?”

Spike grins, evilly. “There’s something I’ve got to tell you, Xanny-boy.” Spike winks at Xander, and then smirks, leaning back while holding onto Xander’s hips harder. Spike pushes up, grinds his crotch against Xander’s a few times until he feels an answering hardness from the boy. “I don’t know why or how or when, but I’ll bet it’s got something to do with Glinda making me all Big Bad again.” Confused and a little bit scared, Xander keeps staring into the vampire’s true face. “See, she didn’t just make me Big again,” Spike breathes, eyes closing to enjoy another hard grind against Xander’s hard cock, “she made me all Bad again too.”

Xander gasps. For a few seconds his thoughts run in all directions screaming and he can’t think, can’t say anything. The first thing that comes out of his mouth eventually is: “Tara’d never do that.”

“Well, not intentionally, you’d think, but doesn’t matter, does it? I can hurt you now, I can hurt people again.” Spike smirks again and lifts one hand from Xander’s hip to rub his thumb against one elongated tooth.

“Yeah, nice. But – do you?” Xander pauses. He calculates his chances to get away from the vampire, chip or no chip, and comes to the result ‘zero’. No chance. He’s always gonna be Spike’s now. And he always knew that one day the vampire would find a way to lose the chip. He isn’t that naïve. “Do you want to hurt people? Do you want to hurt me?” The second part comes out more hesitantly than Xander intended.

Spike seems to really consider Xander’s question. He slides back into the human face and holds his body still, his head cocked to the side. “No and no.” He finally admits before his face falls back into a smirk, eyebrow cocked and blue eyes sparkling. “Only in a good way, that is. Only if you want me to.” He grins and drags Xander down into a kiss that makes the boy forget about the conversation.

Spike, though, grins into the boy’s neck when Xander licks the skin of his shoulder. He really doesn’t want to go back to his old ways, but it’s a relief to know he’ll be able to defend himself and his own again. And, of course, he’ll claim Xander soon, even turn him when the time comes, and nobody’ll touch his boy again without his permission. He makes a note to thank Glinda when they get back.

However, now he’s in an aeroplane (almost) alone with Xander and he’ll not waste this opportunity.

Xander is eager to please him and thankful, with little moans and gasps, for what he receives. Spike makes sure Xander gets more than he hopes for every time. He makes Xander stand up and pull off his clothes as soon as they are high up in the air and the “seat belt” sign goes off. Spike drinks in the sight of Xander naked in front of him, his cock hard and shining with drops of liquid at the top already. Spike smiles and undoes the buttons on his own jeans, he’s as hard as Xander is and his cock strains forward as soon as the fly is open. “Come here, luv. Turn around, sit on my lap.”

Xander struggles to comply. He’s still wet from the sex in the morning, but facing Willow with Spike’s cock up his ass?

“Come on, luv, ‘s going to be sooo good.” Spike manages to work his thumb into Xander’s ass and works the boy’s cock with the other hand until Xander can’t withstand anymore. Xander needs more to fill him. To be one with Spike has already gotten comfortable and needed.

Xander feels achingly empty when Spike pulls back his hands and uses them to hold onto his hips to guide him backwards, guide Xander onto his hardness. They both sigh when Xander is completely seated on Spike’s muscular thighs, the vampire fully sheathed in the human. They rock into each other, Spike talking dirty and Xander answering with moans and groans. He has closed his eyes against the sight of Willow, sedated and bound, on the seat across from them. Kink goes a long way, but not this far.

They’re close to the finish line when Xander feels Spike bite his shoulder, human teeth slowly morphing into vampiric ones and sinking deeply into the muscle there. Xander cries out and comes with the first pull of blood. Hot white streams shoot from between his own and Spike’s tangled fingers, one missing Willow’s shoe only by an inch.

It doesn’t hurt; Xander hadn’t been expecting pain anyway, but somehow he’s still surprised. His body is consumed by a burning hotness, that shoots through him, fills every fibre of his being, body, mind and heart with a sense of completeness that’s so strong, it’s nearly overwhelming.

Spike recognises the taste of Xander’s blood immediately from the times the boy had offered him a spoonful of it when he’d been 3-Inches-small. It’s delicious, addictive even. Still, he doesn’t drink much, just enough to get a full taste and a nicely filled belly. Spike comes shuddering only moments after Xander; while he imagines, one day, turning him as his childe, his mate, forever.

Epilogue

It takes Willow the better half of a year to get her magic abilities under control. Tara has been in contact with her all the time, using all kinds of media like letters, calls and internet video conferences. She comes back balanced, anchored and more in love with Tara than ever before. Tara has never stopped loving Willow with all her heart and when the redhead returns, Tara takes the witch into a strong embrace and gives her a passionate kiss to the surprise of everybody watching.

Over the months of Willow’s absence, Tara has become friends with Garld who proves to be the talented white witch and has the ability to set up the protection spells on the shop and Xander’s apartment. Together with Garld, Willow and Tara are three witches, able to form a strong triangle, that helps stabilise Willow and, later on, the Hellmouth against bad spells and rituals.

Spike and Buffy agree on a truce and they each patrol one half of Sunnydale, helping each other out sometimes with the big nasties. In the first week, Spike finds and destroys the group of vampires that tried to trap him and who had been planning to try again. Still he’s a bit thankful for their attempt. Without it, he’d never have found his nummy treat.

Spike never moves out of the apartment. He adds to the household by patrolling and with the money he wins in dubious poker games. Xander doesn’t mind. He loves the way, things like the old wooden chest or the rows of books appear suddenly and fill the apartment with a homey atmosphere. The Scoobies come to visit - after Tara had made even Buffy understand that Spike and Xander now belonged together - and Dawn hangs around a lot, eating pizza and watching videos with them. Xander is happier than ever before. One night with the moon shining through the enormous windows, Spike claims Xander and promises him forever whenever he’s ready for it.

Forever comes faster than they thought. Despite Spike’s efforts to keep Xander safe in Sunnydale, the boy is injured in a car accident in the middle of the day. An old woman not paying attention and Xander crashes against a street light trying to avoid hitting her car. There is something wrong with his legs and Spike really can’t concentrate on what Giles is trying to tell him on the phone. Xander is weak in the bond and in pain, he looks pale and fragile on the hospital bed, but he smiles when he sees his mate.

Xander had talked to Willow, Tara and Garld ages ago about the worst case scenario and they’d promised to help him bind his soul to his body even after his natural death. The only rule had been to make sure that the slayer and her watcher witnessed Xander’s consent if possible. Grimly, Buffy and Giles agree when Spike gathers the boy up from the hospital bed.

Spike takes Xander home and makes him completely his under the pale light of the moon. Xander awakes with a smile on his new face and love shining from golden eyes. “Forever starts with 3 Inches.” Xander lisps through his new set of teeth and Spike laughs, loud and drunken with joy.

The End

It's done. Finished. Finally. Thank you for reading and I hope you enjoyed it at least a little bit. It would be great if you'd mail me with feedback, concrit or ideas for the series of ficlets I promised Little_Tenshi for every Fanomic she'll draw in the "3-Inches-'Verse". Just think: "Things Spike did not do with Xander when he was 3- Inches-small."

Overview

=> 3 Inches
01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | 06 | 07 | 08 | 09 | 10 |
11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | epilogue
+ Fanomics by Little_Tenshi